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An Anonymous Letter to Dad from Alienated Child

Dear Dad,

It’s been almost one year since I’ve spoken to you at all, but I feel pretty good, despite the ache in my heart that I don’t talk about to anyone.  Mom has not mentioned your name, or your wife’s name in such a long time that I feel free.  Yes, I know I completely ignored you the last time I saw you coincidentally in the mall parking lot, but Mom was right there!  Did you really expect me to carry on a conversation with you in front of Mom?  I know Mom wants me to know what you “do to her…and what you do to us”.  I’ll tell you one thing, when you were talking directly to me telling me how much you love me, and I just turned my head the opposite direction with a blank stare I really wanted to cry.  But, after Mom and I just kept ignoring you, you finally got the hint and walked away to your car.  Mom immediately drove up to your car and took a few photos of you getting in the car because she said that you “were stalking us”.

You know we don’t want to talk to you, so why do you even try?  I have a cell phone, but I’m not allowed to give you the number, and why would I want to?  We don’t have a home phone anymore, but even when we did I had to get to have “permission” to answer calls from you, so I just ignored the ringing.  Mom never gives me the messages that you leave on her cell phone.  I wouldn’t call you back anyway.  I have to make Mom feel comfortable, she just went through a divorce with my Step-Dad, I’m the ONLY one she has.  I have to take care of my little brother and sister so Mom can spend her time “healing”.  If I upset Mom she will fall apart.  This is my rightful place.  A child belongs with their mother, haven’t you ever heard that?  Besides, Mom knows what is best for me and because you are so irresponsible I am better off not seeing you.  Besides, you have children from your marriage with “that woman”.  She is the one who took you away from Mom, and your marriage to her is illegal, right?

I am your first born child.  Mom says I should come first and foremost in your life, before your wife.  You don’t put me first.  Yea, I remember I used to get along really good with “the other woman”.  I could NEVER tell Mom that, she would be so sad.  But, I know “your other wife” dictates your every move, why else would you reduce the child support you are paying Mom?  We need that money!  I also know that your wife tells you what to do because you always followed Mom’s directions, and now you don’t.

I have a responsibility to look after Mom.  You left us.  Then my jerk step-dad left us.  My brother and sister are very little and I have to care for them.  I am the one holding this family together so Mom can do things that make her feel good about herself.  So, don’t call me.  Don’t call us.  We don’t want to hear from you, because you have hurt us time and time again.  Mom said your marriage wasn’t going to last long, but it’s been 10 years so far.  Why do you love other people but not Mom and me?  Tell Grandma and Grandpa not to call either because they won’t believe Mom anymore and give her sympathy.  She was your first wife, they should be loyal to her, not “the other woman who stole you away from us”.

Who knows about the future.  Right now I don’t need a dumb Dad.  I have my loving, beautiful, perfect Mom.  Moms love their children more anyway.

Your alienated child.